The Cow

So, after our trip to the ER, since it was past dinner time we decided to go to BK to get some burgers and fries for the kids b/c they were so good (and BK has a nice $1 menu). We rounded the corner of the building after paying and picking up our order, and this is what we saw across the parking lot in the grass at the edge of the parking lot.



Yup, a beef cow had gotten out from the neighboring pasture and made it's way into the BK parking lot.

I called the Sheriff's Department (b/c Animal Control only deals in dogs and cats) and the conversation with the Dispatcher went something like this.

Dispatcher: Hillsborough County Sheriff's Department, how may I help you?

Me: I'm calling to report a cow loose at McIntosh and I-4.

Dispatcher: You're saying there's a cow loose?

Me: Yes ma'am.

Dispatcher: Is the cow on McIntosh or on I-4?

Me: Well, actually, it's in the Burger King parking lot there at McIntosh and I-4.

(I heard silence and then some snickering in the back ground. It appeared as though the Dispatcher lady couldn't decide if this was some sort of prank call or not)

Dispatcher: There's a cow loose in the Burger Kin parking lot?

Me: Yes ma'am.

Dispatcher: Seriously?

Me: Yes ma'am. I took a picture with my cell phone.

Dispatcher: (laughing hysterically by this point)

Me: Well ma'am, I guess the burgers are going to be fresh tomorrow! (laughing hysterically too by this point)

Dispatcher: (cracking up and roaring with laughter by this point because of the sheer irony of the situation: a cow wandering around the parking lot of a Burger King) Oh My GOSH!

Me: Yes ma'am. This isn't a joke. I am calling you because Animal Control apparently only deals with dogs and cats and not live stock, so I figured calling you would be the best choice since you could send the appropriate people out to handle the situation before the cow makes her way into McIntosh or worse, I-4.

Dispatcher: Thank you for your call, we can handle the situation and I'll send someone out right away.

That was the end of our call. So, when my children ask me to explain irony to them when they're older, I'll simply tell them: a cow getting loose and making it's way into the Burger King parking lot to graze.

Sweet Pea and the ER

With hands shaking from nerves, I had to take my precious Sweet Pea to the ER yesterday. I was nervous b/c a) she was hurt and b) the last time we took her to the ER (at 14 months of age with a broken leg from a freak fall off her changing table, and how we discovered her low bone density) she was taken away from us by DCF and I was accused to snapping my precious little girl's leg like a twig (and even some people close to me doubted my side of the story, siding with the ER Dr. to add insult to injury).

Sweet Pea was playing with my friend's youngest daughter (Blog link SAHM and Air Force Wife). We don't know if they got mad, or the play simply got out of hand, but some how Sweet Pea ended up being pushed into the desk and cutting open her eye lid just below her eye brow. It didn't bleed all that much, but when I got her eye cleaned up and the blood down to just an ooze I realized the cut was deeper than a scratch and needed medical attention. I called our ped's off and had him paged to find out where he wanted us to take her (he has hospital privileges at one of the hospitals in the area) and he said to just take her to the local ER (not his hospital). My friend dropped off me and the kids (DH was at Busch Gardens w/ the car and car seats) and DH met us at the ER. We were in and out in an hour, and thankfully the ANRP who treated Heather was so thrilled that I am a Lactation Consultant that she was more interested in asking my opinion on tongue tie in a baby (her grand son) and viewed me as a professional peer (just with a different specialty) so she never questioned Heather's injury. That was my biggest fear: that b/c the injury could easily have been received by a hard slap or punch out of aggression that I would, once again, fall under the suspicious eye of Dr's and DCF.

I was right in taking her though. She needed her cut glued shut. She never whimpered, just asked questions about what was going on, and watched TV the whole time. She was SUCH a big girl and I was (and am) SO proud of her!

Oh, and FWIW, I was able to back up the ANRP's concerns and agree that with tongue tie to the level she's describing it needs to be clipped. For those interested, tongue tie can cause much more damage to a baby than just cause problems breast feeding. It can cause the palate of the mouth to become misshapen, or not shape properly, which can restrict or compromise blood flow to the teeth and not only cause crooked teeth, but even cause teeth to die off and leading to false teeth and bridges. There's much more in play than just breastfeeding.

So, today my little girl has a nice shiner and glued eye to show off her fun times with her friends. And yes, she's already asking to go play with her friend again. My girl, the social butterfly like her mama!

The Pharmacy Post

The Pharmacy. You get your prescriptions filled there, right? You go with a little piece of paper that has illegible handwriting from your beloved doctor, hand it to a mousey guy in a lab coat, sit around for an hour twiddling your fingers while telling your child no, they can NOT eat the midol/candy/vitamins and no, they can NOT play with all the toys in the toy isle, pull all the books off the book rack, or open all the bottles of soda. Fun, right? You leave with a little bottle in a bag (liquid if you have small children, pills for yourself) and now legible directions on how to dispense this medication, and go home to heal yourself or your child. Simple, right? (insert major eye roll)

Apparently my pharmacy (Walgreens on Thonotasassa/Baker St. for those that know me) can't get it right.

My migraine started Sunday night/Monday morning with the arrival of a nice new pressure system that brought with it some MUCH needed rain. I lay in bed in agony, poor hubby unable to help and by now (after 6 years of marriage) so accustomed to my pain that he just ignores me unless I ask for something (what else can the guy do when he can't ease my pain? He enjoys surfing the web, playing games, watching TV, and if hte kids are up he tends to them...for which I am eternally grateful). By 3:30am I knew I needed help...and my migraine meds weren't cutting it. So, I pulled out two prescriptions that I'd had stashed away from the ER (from one of my frequent trips to the ER for migraines this pregnancy...they now recognize me on sight, sad huh?), handed DH the insurance card for my new secondary insurance (yay! no more co-pays!), and off he goes to the pharmacy for me. I could kiss and hug this man for doing this for me at 4am, but I'd have probably thrown up all over him from the pain so not a good idea.

He comes home 45 min. later (it's a 10 min. drive each way normally, but we are now dealing with road work so it now takes longer at 4am. He tosses me two bags and I notice the receipts: we had to pay the co-pays! I asked about this, asked why we had to w/ the secondary insurance, and he said he didn't know but he'd given the pharmacist the insurance cards: both of them. Oh well, I'm in too much pain. I down a LorTabp with a side of soda and go to bed.

I wake up several hours later, take the other (larger) half of the pill, puke (new symptom this pregnancy: I can't take narcotics w/o puking...lovely), and lay back down only to discover that I'm now nauseous, high, and yes, still in pain. (Oh, side note: while I'm puking at 7am, my precious little son runs into the bathroom, pats my head, and hands me a clean wash cloth...he's such a sweet boy. However, he was then joined by his sister and I found myself puking with an audience cheering me on...Go away, kids! Let mommy puke in peace!)

I spend the rest of the day downing Fiorocet every 2 hours, and finding my migraine fluctuating between all out migraine and just throbbing headache that felt like my eye ball was being stabbed with a knife. Even my emergency chiropractic adjustment didn't get rid of it.

FFW to today. My OB calls this same pharmacy and leaves an Rx for more fiorocet b/c after weeks of migraines I'm almost out. We take Sweet Pea to the ped. and get 2 more Rx for her, plus one for my little man for more of his eczema oil (it's the ONLY thing that keeps him from having quarter sized open weeping, oozing wounds all over his body from his eczema). I take my bag of meds from yesterday with me to dispute the co-pays. They find themselves (they, that is the pharmacy people) with all my Rx's and problems, etc. and finally it's all sorted out (hey, I had a GREAT conversation with my dad while waiting about a house we're trying to buy...he's agreeing to co-sign so now we're just trying to find the best interest rate to finance it). Finally,they call me up to the counter, hand me a dozen bags, issue a refund, and I leave. The reason I'd been charged a co-pay? The pharmacist on call the night before HADN'T EVEN ENTERED MY NEW SECONDARY INSURANCE INTO THE COMPUTER!!!! This annoyed me, but hey...what ever.

I get home. Sweet Pea's once again burning up. I give her more Motrin, and go to give her the 1st dose of HER z-pack and find to my horror THEY DIDN'T MIX UP THE POWDER!!!! They sent me home with a bottle of powder! What if I'd NOT been an experienced or thinking mommy? What if I'd measured out 1 tsp. of the powder for her to take (in a spoon of yogurt, milk, etc.)???? She'd have been REALLY sick! The powder is concentrated, which is why it has to be mixed up (plus it makes it easier to take). So, back to the pharmacy we go. 2nd trip.

The Pharmacist, when I told/showed her what happened, started screaming at some poor girl right out of pharmacy tech school. I've never seen a pharmacist so mad before, and never seen one scream at their assistant in front of customers like that...but they knew if this had happened to someone who didn't have a clue what was going on, it could have been serious. They apologized profusely, corrected the problem, Heather and I leave (by now it's 2pm and we haven't had lunch...which is making me very nauseous). So, we have to go by McD's and order from the dollar menu b/c DH and I are broke college kids trying to get by until we're done with school.

I get home, give her the medicine, DH goes off to work and all is well in the world.

Until my last fiorocet wears off.

I dig through the million or so bags we'd bee sent home with to find my new bottle of happy pills (aka, migraine meds!!!). Imagine my sheer horror and outrage to discover that I'd been sent home without it!!!!

Yes, I had to drag two children back out into the heat, drive ANOTHER 10 min. each way, while in excruciating pain, to get my meds that they didn't give me. I was beyond livid. I was looking at a TOTAL of 1 hr of drive time just going to/from the pharmacy! Oh, and gas is around $3.80 right now.

I called the store and asked to speak to the store manager. 1 mistake at 4am, okay...I can understand and they fixed the situation. 2 mistakes, one that could have harmed my daughter, okay...annoying, but hey...everyone makes mistakes, right? We all had/have to be new on our job at some point, right? THREE mistakes, costing me a total of an hour of driving to/from the pharmacy in agony w/ 2 whining kids (plus the wait times) and I'm mad. It's inexcusable. The store manager was mad to hear how we'd been treated, and mortified about what happened with Sweet Pea's Z-pack. (me thinks that poor girl will be loosing her job based upon how mad the store manager, pharmacy manager, and pharmacist were) He told me the medicine was ready, and in compensation for my time/gas/frustration/pain there would be a gift card in my prescription bag when I got there.

So, while we had to spend much more gas than we'd budgeted, at least we were able to get the ink cartridge for our printer re-filled!

I'm still in shock and awe over what all happened. And to think: this is our only option for a "close" pharmacy! Yes, this is why we're trying to buy a double wide in a mobile home community right now: cut costs, save on gas, and GET THROUGH SCHOOL! *sigh* At least my little girl is resting w/ her meds and my migraine is finally gone.

Sick

My precious girl is sick. Both of my children were cursed with their father's allergies, Little Dude being allergic to over 100 things that we know of for sure (thanks to the marvels of allergy testing done at the tender age or 8 and 9 months).

Well, it's that time of year again. Allergy Season. The trees are growing new leaves, the flowers are in bloom, the yards are being cut weekly...and my kids and hubby can't breath. Plus Sweet Pea got a cold. Oh, and being my child who is so tender hearted and kind and generous she shared it...with me. I ended up with a throat infection hacking up stuff that resembles slimy sludgy mucousy stuff from some B rated SciFi movie and on to a Z-Pack! (apparently while pregnant ANY infection in the body can go to the uterus and/or baby and, well, we don't want that...baby isn't viable yet). Anyway, over the last couple of days she's gone from coughing, sneezing, stuffy head/sinuses and runny nose to coughing, sneezing, stuffy head/sinuses and NO runny nose.

Yesterday, the fever set in. I had a migraine and couldn't get her to the ped. so I did what I usually do, upped her decongestants and started the motrin.

Today it was worse. Waking temp of 102. My OB calls in more migraine meds for me (THANK YOU HOPE! YOU ROCK!) and off we go to the ped. Sure enough, just as I suspected: sinus infection. (BTW: i LOVE our ped! He gets us in as soon as we can get there regardless of what's going on....and he's this way with ALL his patients! No calling and crossing all bodily appendages praying that your sick child whose eyes are glazed over and temp is 107....b/c yes, Sweet Pea's fevers get that high in the blink of an eye...can be seen SOMETIME that day...he sees you as soon as you can get there...and you rarely wait more than 30 min. with 5 being the norm).

Of course, by the time we got there her temp was normal thanks to the Motrin, but they still know her body's MO and checked her. Thank you clogged, infected sinuses. I never thought I'd hear the day that a 4 yr old ASKS for us to squirt prescription saline up her nose! LOL

As for our escapades with the pharmacy, well, that's another post. (off to start the next post...)

Breastmilk...it Does a Body Good

Jiang Xiaojuan, Jiangyou County Public Security Bureau in Sichuan is an ordinary civilian police, she was in the picture shelters for the earthquake victims in an earthquake orphans breastfeeding.

CHENGDU, China - A Chinese policewoman is contributing to the country’s massive earthquake relief effort in a very personal way -- by breastfeeding eight babies.

A newspaper in Chengdu, the capital of quake-hit Sichuan province, devoted a special page to the 29-year-old woman, calling her a “hero.”

The woman from the quake-ravaged town of Jiangyou has just had a child herself, the Western Urban Daily said.

She is nursing the children of three women who were left homeless by the quake and are too traumatised to give milk, as well as five orphans, the report said.

The babies who lost their parents have been put in an orphanage which does not have powdered milk, it said.

An estimated 50,000 people were killed in the May 12 earthquake, China’s worst natural disaster in a generation.

Birth Order

I usually just do these things for a laugh and leave it at that. This one, however, seemed to have hit the nail on the head so I thought I'd share.

You Are Likely a First Born

At your darkest moments, you feel guilty. At work and school, you do best when you're researching. When you love someone, you tend to agree with them often. In friendship, you are considerate and compromising. Your ideal careers are: business, research, counseling, promotion, and speaking. You will leave your mark on the world with discoveries, new information, and teaching people to dream.

The Birth Order Predictor

The Lord Giveth, and the Lord Taketh Away

I have been SO emotional today because of this, and will attempt to type this out without crying again.

A friend's son passed away this morning. He was 6 years old.

There's a mother I know. She is a WAHM (work at home mom) and is on two online forums that I frequent so I've know her/about her for a while. About 2 weeks after Heather was born (yes, 4 years ago) the day before her 3rd son's 2nd birthday, this boy (named Samuel) was diagnosed with Leukemia. They started chemo and after a nice battle (during which he had a younger sister born) he went into remission. After a while, he came out of remission and they opted to treat him holistically. Once again, he went into remission. He eventually came out of that remission too. Last August/September he ended up getting massive amounts of antibiotics that destroyed his gut. (For those that don't know, antibiotic use kills all the flora in the gut, even the good stuff...which is why we try so hard not to use antibiotics unless they are truly needed...and we only use them along with double doses of probiotics to help keep the good flora in the gut present...to prevent yeast infections and from killing the gut). He was on steroids for several months and that masked his symptoms.

All week I've been following his mom's blog more intently than usual because she made note that Samuel was at the end. They were no longer trying to save his life because his gut was dead...and you can't live without your gut. He ended up on enough medications of two pain meds to kill a grown man, and that was what it took to ease his pain so he could color and play with his brother and sisters.

His parents are Christians. The depth of his mother's love for the Lord is evident in her posts. The last day of her son's life she wrote about how much Samuel must love his family because he should have died many times over and continued to fight to be with them. She stated that if her son loves his family that much, how much more must God and Jesus love us? She wrote about how this is NOT God causing her son to be sick, but Satan attacking the world and us as Christians. She said that soon her son would be with God, and the cancer demons that have hurt him for most of her son's life would die along with her son's earthly body while her son danced in the presence of our Lord.

How strong is this woman? The depth of her love for the Lord and her son is inspiring.

Samuel went home to be with our Lord today. Early this morning.

My heart aches for Jen (his mother). I am a mother. I have a little boy who is only 6 weeks older than her son was when he was diagnosed with cancer. I look at my little boy, and see the life and joy in his eyes my heart breaks. Her little boy was filled with just as much joy and life and love. He was born at home, into the loving arms of his family, surrounded by his family, and he left his world the same way...in his parents' arms surrounded by his family. His siblings have learned a painful lesson about love and life. So as a mother, my heart breaks and aches for this mother and her pain.

But my heart rejoices for Samuel. He is where my heart and soul long to be: with our Lord and Savior. OH how I long for the day that I am with Christ! I pray for the sake of my children that the day I arrive in Heaven is many many years from now, but until then I still ache for it. Samuel feels no pain...no suffering. He feels pure joy and peace.

The Lord gives us children...and sometimes He takes them away. He brings people we love into our life, be it friends, family, or spouse...and He takes them away. And when those people know the Lord as their savior, the pain for missing them here on earth (especially when a precious life is ended at such a young tender age) is countered by the joy, peace, and hope that we will see them again, and that they are with God...with Jesus! We find God giving us Joy and Peace and enabling us to rejoice for those that have passed! We celebrate their life, and we celebrate their eternal life! Praise the LORD! He is with Jesus!

So please pray for my online friend and her family as they grieve the loss of a precious child, and have to help their children understand the loss as well. Please pray that this peace is brought down upon them in such a multitude that it is almost overwhelming. Please pray that they are able to find joy and rejoice in their son's blessing: being with his Savior. Please pray that they continue to turn to God as their rock and to help guide them through the pain to come.

Okay, so I failed...and for the umpteenth time today I am once again crying. I cry from sorrow, and I cry from joy.

BEWARE of Motherhood Maternity!

So I was checking my bank act. today and noticed a $20 charge from Parenting Magazine. I don't like Parenting Magazine, I've never subscribed to it, and my DH doesn't either. I called him at work and asked him about the charge. He freaked out b/c a) it destroyed our very tenuous budget for the summer (we're $600 a month short for the summer, but will be fine again come August...it's just a summer thing) b) we never subscribed to this magazine!

So, I called the 800 number associated with the charge (thank you BOA for listing these numbers w/ the charges). They said they got my information from MOTHERHOOD! They asked if I'd recently been there and been asked if I want the two free issues. I said yes, I had and that I refused. I asked that they please cancel the subscription and please refund me the money. They said no problem, and the money will be back in a week (in the mean time, that's half a week's worth of gas that we're going to be short).

I then call Motherhood. After this crazy 3 min. long schpeel about how great their products are from some British recording, I get to the menu. You know, press 1 for ___________, press 2 for _______, etc. There wasn't any option for, "I'm pi$$ed off b/c you gave out my credit information" so I had to press "0" for the "general catch all I want to talk to a living breathing person."

Then, I get a message that all their reps are busy. No biggie, I'll hold for 2 hours if I have to to find out how in the HEDES they are legally able to give out MY PERSONAL FINANCIAL CREDIT INFORMATION. Nope. "Call back later" they say.

I found a number for Motherhood's corporate office and spoke w/ a person whose entire job is dealing w/ issues regarding the parenting magazine "promo" they have going on. How sad is it when they have an entire job dedicated to this??? Anyway, she is going to investigate to make sure that all the stores know if a person says no, it means no. She couldn't, however, answer my question: how is it legal for them to give out my information WITHOUT a signature from me? She did say that when you agree to the promo, if you don't cancel the subscription within the time frame (2 months) then they (Parenting) will charge you how ever you paid for your Motherhood purchase (if paid for w/ a debit or credit card, with cash you get a bill). So my question still stands: how can they give Parenting magazine my financial (debit card) information w/o my signature? I couldn't even get a real apology from the lady I talked to. She said she was sorry that protocol wasn't followed, but not that my financial information was given out w/o my permission.

For those that don't know, Motherhood is a maternity apparel store. I've never liked their return policies, so I shop there as little as possible, but their sales are really good and affordable if you're not wanting to spend hundreds of dollars on clothing you'll wear for 6-12 months. Also, my husband says that we did get the 2 free issues, but he didn't know about the little hitch on getting charged for them and thought they'd stop after the 2 months, or we'd get a bill and he'd just call and tell them thanks but no thanks. He doesn't know how wicked Motherhood can be, and just took over the finances in our home so is we've been in a bit of a "transitional" phase. Still, I never agreed to the two free issues so some employee messed up. But still...HOW can they sell/give out my debit card information????

I am still seething, hours later, and feel horribly violated. Some of my online forum buddies are encouraging me and DH to pursue a legal suit against the company if only to stop them from doing this to any other people. We're getting our $20 back, so I feel iffy in doing this...but they're right: this company is HUGE! The mother company oversees THREE of the biggest maternity apparel stores in the country...how many other people are being ripped off or having their FINANCIAL information sold?

It's scary.

No, it's terrifying.

God Is Working

I've always said that as a Christian God is always working in my life. It's particularly neat to look back and see where His hand has been and to "see" how God has been working in your life.

Right now, though, God is working on my heart. He has been preparing my heart and my mind to become receptive to information regarding some major character flaws from those around me. This has been painful, but wonderful too. My only sadness is that I have pushed several friends away in the process.

I am a very out going person. Yes, those that know me will likely laugh at this statement because they know how true it is. I am also a passionate person. There's noting wrong with passion, but the way that I project this passion onto others IS a problem. I am a loving person who loves to share my passions with those around me. When I learn something new that I feel strongly about, I can't help but want to share this revelation with everyone I love! I want others to discover what I have discovered and to see and experience the thrill of my revelation. In short, I'm wanting to help people. This isn't wrong. However, I tend to beat the topic to death in an attempt to "win people" to my side. Rather than sharing what I've learned with my friends, I harp on the subject over and over and over until they don't want to be around me any more because they are so sick of hearing what I have to say. In short, I have a "go forth and conquer consequences be damned" mentality. This is NOT Christ-like behavior.

God has been helping me learn when to share what I think/feel with a person and when not to. When the time is right, and I drop the information for what ever topic is at hand, He has been helping me learn when to back off. This has been a HUGE revelation and is a work in progress.

The other aspect of my personality that makes this lesson so hard to learn is that when I do learn something new I turn to those I love to share the information. I HAVE to get it out, to share my excitement. I do not believe there's anything wrong with this...the line is crossed when conversation after conversation I continue to harp on the topic. Thank you to those who are patient enough to let me "get it out of my system".

I want to thank my husband for helping me to learn this about myself, as well as for putting up with me for all these years. I love him SO much! I'd also like to thank several of my friends for being loving enough to put up with me for so long, and to help me gently learn and accept that everyone is different, every family is different, and what I love and works for me may or may not work for everyone else. Thank you Kristin, Jen, and Becca. I love you girls SO much! Please continue to be patient with me as God continues to work in my heart and my life. Feel free to tell me if I'm "doing it again" in our conversations, and going beyond the simple "getting it out of my system." I love you all SO much and thank God regularly for all of you in my life.

Horse Love

As many people already know, my precious little girl LOVES horses. She's been begging me to let her start riding for a very long time now (over a year, and she's been asking for a horse of her own since Christmas 2006, yes 2.5 years old! LOL). I've been calling around for a while as well, looking for a trainer and stable that would fit my requirements. They are:

1) Not a show barn - my preschool age daughter doesn't need to be in a place training her for shows...not yet anyway.

2) Teaches english riding (versus Western) - English requires much more balance and skill than western, so I want her to learn this first and then she can learn western down the road if she wants. Not likely, though, because she wants to jump.

3) Will teach ALL aspects of equine care, knowledge, etc. not just showing up, hopping on, and riding. I want her to learn all the parts of the horse, the colors, how to groom, tack up, cool down, bathe, muck stalls, etc. as she reaches appropriate ages. (No, I'm not expecting my 4 year old to muck out a stall and tack up her own pony, LOL).

4) Affordable

5) Within a 30 min. drive

Well, I think DH stumbled upon the barn for us today. He found an add for a lady, who also offers big discounts for homeschooling families, and when I called the lady was excited that I wanted to start Heather ate the age of 4, believes in teaching all aspects of horsemanship, and met every other qualification that I had! We're going tomorrow to meet her and see the stables and if I still feel good about it, we'll sign her up for her first private lesson. :o) I'm thinking 2 lessons a month would be plenty for her, and still not impact our finances.

I Don't Get It.

I know I will step on a lot of toes by posting this, which is why I keep my mouth shut on this topic unless a) asked b) the mother/parent I am talking to is in a frame of mind to be receptive to this information and not take it as a personal attack. I NEVER mean the sharing of this information as an attack on anyone: personal or not. This is my rant, my vent. If you don't like what I have to say, then you may read another post or find another blog. It won't bother me any. This is MY place to rant.

I was prompted to write all this because I am pregnant, and as such posting on some pregnancy boards. I've finally had enough of sitting on my fingers and biting my cyber tongue, so I came to MY blog to get this all off of my chest.

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I don't claim to be perfect. In fact, I am far from it. I am a sinner just like every other human being walking the face of the earth today. I have nothing against formula. It was created to be a substitute to sustain a child who is unable to have her mother's milk (note: I will use the gender "her" so keep thing simple, but I am referring to infants of both genders). It was never intended to take the place of mother's milk simply "because." In fact, The World Health Organization (WHO) even states that the use of formula should be limited to a last resort. They recommend:

1) The mother's breast.
2) The mother's milk expressed for baby if the breast is not available or separated
3) If mother's milk is not available, the use of donated milk through milk banks
4) If no human milk is available, then use breast milk substitute.

(http://boycottnestle.blogspot.com/2007/08/industry-attack-philippines.html - about half way down the page is the quote from the WHO representative).

So, why is it then, when the rest of the world is calling formula "breast milk substitute" are educated women, women holding bachelors, masters, and doctoral degrees, making the conscious choice to not even attempt to breast feed? Why are they saying, "well, I know they say breast is best, but I just don't believe there's enough of a difference," or "Well, my other child(ren) was formula fed and s/he is healthy so I just don't believe there's that much of a difference."

Comments like these, especially coming from educated women, makes me want to bang my head into a wall. When I DO present the information on the truths, nay the HAZARDS of formula, they brush it off as "bias" and say that as an LC (Lactation Consultant) I am biased so I'm not a reliable person to get information from. *continue banging head into wall* Let me clear the air, and this common myths, not LIES, about LCs and formula.

I am a Lactation Consultant. I am educated in things that the average person AND DOCTORS do not know. EVERY SCRAP of information that I give out is evidence based, and when asked I will provide the person queering with the exact studies done by IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, what I am aspiring to be through my work towards my BA in Human Lactation) AND DOCTORS not just in the US, but AROUND THE WORLD!!! So, if I am pulling out study after study (and yes, I have hundreds of pages of studies listed in a book of resources that I consult) done by such a diverse group of people in so many countries, how am I biased or is my information bias? I will not list my personal opinion on a matter when representing myself as an LC unless asked, and never without stating that it is my opinion only, and not yet proven yay or nay through research. Saying that I am biased against formula is like saying that engineer is biased against a piece of equipment that has been proven to be less effective than another piece of equipment through studies and research that said engineer has had no part in.

Using formula to sustain and grow a baby IS A HAZARD!!! Why? I will begin my explanation using simple, more broad, arguments and then become more specific. So site tight if you want to know WHY formula is something to be used not at your own risk, but at the risk of your child.

1) Human babies were designed to be nourished by human milk. When any other baby mammal (such as a kitten, puppy, foal, or dolphin) is separated from it's birth mother, every attempt is made to place that baby with another lactating female of it's own species. Why is this done? Every mammal species makes milk for the very very specific requirements of it's own babies growth and needs.

A baby cow needs to grow very quickly, and needs to be able to run to flee danger. Thus, it's mother's milk is made up of components to enable a baby cow to grow as needed for it's life. It's mother's milk is: 3.7% fat to accommodate rapid growth, 3.4% protein to accommodate it's quick muscular development to flee from danger, 4.8% Lactose, and 0.7% Ash. It requires 47 days to double it's birth weight. (Lawrence, 2005).

A reindeer has needs much the same, but due to it's colder climates it needs to gain much more body fast much quicker and needs to be able to run much faster, much sooner. It's mother's milk is: 16.9% fat, 11.5% protein, 2.8% lactose, and zero ash. It takes 30 days to double it's birth weight. (Lawrence, 2005)

A baby human needs to put on weight to survive any illness it may encounter but rather it needs to develop mentally much more than it needs to develop physically. The components of breast milk are designed to encourage the rapid growth that a human brain undergoes. Our milk is: 3.8% fat, .09% protein, 7.0% lactose, .2% ash. It takes your baby 180 days to double it's 6-8lb birth weight. (Lawrence, 2005)

If you are interested in learning more about this check out the book "Breastfeeding: A Guide for the Medical Professional" by Lawrence and Lawrence (2005 edition). It has an entire chapter (lengthly chapter, complete with tables and graphs) dedicated just to the biochemical make up of human milk.

2) Formula does not contain living cells that help promote the physical and mental health and development for a baby. For instance, a single drop of breast milk has over 100,000 white blood cells in it. Human milk also contains living stem cells. These are things that formula can not simulate.

3) The intestinal wall of an infant contains villi, little finger like projections. These villi act as filters for the baby's blood stream. The catch the nutritional components of the baby's diet and pass it into the blood stream while passing the waist and allergens and bad aspects on to the intestines to be excreted as waste.

Formula strips away the Villi. This causes the intestinal wall to become porous and allow for allergens to pass into the baby's blood stream. This makes the baby susceptible to developing food allergies. This is especially bad for babies who come from families with a history of food allergies. It takes 6 weeks for these villi to grow back from a single bottle of formula that may be pushed upon the mother in the hospital by well meaning nurses ("But mom, your colostrum isn't enough right now. Your baby will become dehydrated if you don't give her formula." being the most common bit of misinformation given to new mothers by nurses in the hospital). Babies that are fed a diet of nothing but formula are not allowed to regrow the villi and leave their gut in a constant state of attack.

Additionally, the villi is what is involved in the passing the lactose into the blood stream. A human baby needs lots of lactose (high in sugar) to grow; more than any other mammal baby. If the Villi are gone, then pure fat is what is causing baby to grow. This causes extra fat stores in a baby, and what a formula fed baby is more likely to develop Type 1 or Type 2 diabetes than a breast fed baby.

4) Babies that come from families prone to diabetes are more likely to develop diabetes in life if fed infant formula instead of breast milk.

*** *** ***

Now, while I have listed all of the reasons why formula is dangerous to feed your baby, I want to clear something first. I recognize that formula is needed for some babies. Some mothers are "unable" to breast feed. However, I am going to go into a mom being "unable" to breast feed.

Most mothers who do not succeed in breast feeding their babies (I am reluctant to call it "failing" at breast feeding since this is not a test) do so because of any or all of the reasons below.

* They lack a support system - the people that surround a new mother need to be supportive of her choosing to breast feed. It is something that takes much dedication and is rarely accomplished if her husband, mom, mother-in-law, friends, etc. around her are not breast feeding or not supportive of breast feeding. Comments such as "Just give her one bottle, it won't hurt," do not help the situation any. Even worse is when a well meaning mother or mother-in-law tries to undermine the mother or convince the mother to give bottles because she (the mother/MIL) wants to help feed the baby too. When the support of, "Come on! You can do this! You are doing such a wonderful thing for you baby!" and "Come on, just one more feeding/day/week/month/etc. You can do this!" to help encourage mom to reach her mini goals. These are all wonderful things that help a new mother keep going.

* "My milk dried up." or "I didn't make enough milk" is a common argument. Being bombarded with samples of formula from formula companies. The cans for the "occasional" bottle to "give mom a break" are often times the beginning of the end. If mom replaces one feeding at the breast with a bottle of formula, it is telling her body to make one feeding less of milk. That's one feeding she physically won't be able to give her baby, which leads to another feeding from a bottle, then another and another, etc. until her milk has diminished to almost nothing. When combined with someone saying, "Well, you can't make enough milk for you baby," this can be in and of itself the beginning of the end.

* When baby has a problem, and mom is not being supported or seeking advice from a breastfeeding professional (such as a Lactation Consultant or La Leche League leader), or doubts and does not follow the advice of the professional given (or even is given misinformation by a well meaning "professional" such as, "oh, you have to use a nipple shield" being a VERY common one) then the breastfeeding relationship is in peril. Combine it with the free samples on hand, mom doubting herself, and/or the lack of a good support system and their relationship is over before it started.

These are the most common reasons why new moms end up formula feeding. These are all things that are very easily remedied. With the Internet in almost every home, all a mom has to do is goggle a query to find sound, evidence supported, information from sites such as kellymom.com and llli.org. It is disheartening as an LC to see moms not utilizing these free tools and caving to any of the above road blocks. It is frustrating to see a mom not listen to the LCs and La Leche League leaders around her and rather listen to the dated, often mis-information, given by their mothers.

These are the situations that frustrate me. Not the ones where a woman had a breast reduction and is unable to breast feed. Or the baby was given bottles in the NICU against mother's wishes, and will no longer accept the breast. Formula DOES have it's place. It's place is NOT on the shelves of every store, mailed to new mothers, passed out in diaper bags, and given away at baby showers.

Very little thrills me more then when a mother whose breastfeeding relationship was damaged with her first child comes to me or any other breastfeeding professional and goes on to breastfeed her next/future child(ren). To these mothers, I applaud and hug and cheer.

In short, I wish mothers would stop listening to the lies of the formula companies that "formula is just as good" when scientifically it's proven that it is NOT "just as good." When all the evidence proves that formula is not a good thing for every baby to be raised upon just because it's "there" acting as a rubber crutch to new mothers in a society that normalizes infant feeding with cans of formula, bottles, and artificial nipples. Why can't mothers just listen to their instincts!? Why can't more mothers stand up to these societal lies!?

If you got this far, thank you for reading the rants and raves of a hormonal, pregnant, tired, mother.

(Lawrence and Lawrence (2005). Breastfeding: A Guide for the Medical Professional. p. 107. Elsevier Mosby, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. )

The Things Kids Say...

I was rearranging some stuff in my DD and DS room. (they share a room b/c DS sleeps better that way and DD LOVES it; they're 2 and 4). I pulled the crib mattress out from under my DDs bed, and set it on hers. I needed to move it to the office (soon to be nursery) so that I could put some under the bed storage boxes full of toys under her bed instead.

Well, she saw the mattress up there and asked why it was up there. Here's a dialogue of our conversation.

Me: "It's up there because we need to move it to the office. That's going to become the new baby's room, and the baby will need to sleep on that mattress."

DD: "But what is the other one going to sleep on?"

Me: "What other one?"

DD: "The other baby?"

Me: "What other baby?"

DD: "The other baby in your belly."

Me: "What other baby in my belly?"

DD: "The baby brother and the baby sister, mommy. There's two babies."

AGH!!!!! Can I scream and pull my hair out now? She's got me scared. My nephew was saying the same thing last week in OK when he saw me. Then, my mom tells me today that twins run in our family, there just haven't been any in 2 generations. GEE THANKS MOM!

*sigh* So now I'm going to beg my Dr. for an u/s on Tuesday to check for twins. It doesn't help that all my pregnancy dreams have involved more than one baby (and always boy/girl).

Rant: Health Insurance

I'm SO upset right now. DH just got the new information for insurance for his job. It's highway robbery. No kidding. We are currently paying $500 a month JUST for him and myself. Our children, being half Native American, are covered through the state. If we were to add them we'd be paying $900 a month. My husband makes $15 an hour and we survive off of his income alone (+ his VA disability of $400 a month and his G.I. Bill paying our $1100 a month rent for a modular home in a REALLY low income part of town). We just got the new rates for insurance for the next year. The current rates are crippling us, but the coverage is good. Very good. So, we found out that we're going to have to go from paying $250 a pay check ($500 a month) for insurance to $412 a pay check, or $894 a month!!!!! HOLY GEEZ!!! DOUBLING our rates! The crappy part? Our ER visit co-pay will go from $100 a visit to $200 a visit, Drs visits will go from $10/$20 a visit to $15/$25 a visit. We go from paying flat rates for things like hospitalizations to paying a percentage!!!!! WHAT THE HECK! So, they're doubling our monthly premium and then upping our co-pays and such???? He'll go from bringing home $900 a pay check to $700 a pay check and we just can't afford that!!!

We can't afford it. There's no other way around it, we can't afford it. Our only option is to drop the insurance all together and have me go back on medicaid. I DON'T want to do that. We fall in the income bracket for it in our area, but GEEZ...I don't want to have other people paying for our planned pregnancy. A pregnancy that we could afford last month but can't afford next month.

We can drop our rate down, choose a cheaper plan, but then our costs go up so much more that we can't afford the care that way either. ARG! Why does his company HAVE to go with a company that is SO STINKING EXPENSIVE!!!! There are other companies out there, why do they have to go with THIS one????

I don't know what to do. I'm in tears right now. This is SO not fair!!!

Letting the Cat out of the Bag

Baby #3 is coming November 2008!

Just for Jen

I LOVE YOU GIRL!!!

The Breast Crawl

I saw several videos of this while going through my lactation consultant training. When I found one on YouTube I just HAD to put it on here. It's amazing! God sure knew what he was doing. It's amazing how the baby's movements not only stimulate mother's milk but also her uterus to start clamping down to prevent hemorrhage. Once the baby is nursing, the oxytocin is released that further signals the uterus to clamp down. God is GREAT!

So Confused

I am finding myself in a state of confusion right now. I just don't know where God is taking me as a person, me as a mother, me as a wife, or us as a family.

I am currently planning on going back to USF (U of South Florida) to finish my music degree. I love music, I love flute, and I can teach out of my home to help supplement my husband's income. This will allow me to stay home and home school our children as planned. I feel very strongly about this, and so does DH (at least he feels strongly about private school or home, no public school, and he supports my desire to home school 200%).

However, God has place two passions in my heart: classical music performance and babies (yes, to those that knew me in high school...ironic...I know). I have a dream.

I know what happened to Dr. King when he had a dream, but mine is different.

Mine is to play flute. In Symphonies. To make beautiful music. While playing gorgeous classical music I feel, in my heart of hearts and soul of souls that I am closer to God...this is my way of worshiping Him. I love God with every fibre of my being.

However, my other passion is to help mothers. New mothers. To help women to educate themselves during pregnancy, but mostly to help them after their baby is born. I love to help mothers and babies learn how to breastfeed. I love supporting mothers and helping them through the hard spots, as well as supporting them in every breastfeeding decision they make. period. Even if it's to wean at 6 weeks. I love making mom feel supported (even if her decision isn't the one that I make, I love helping her feel supported regardless). I love helping mothers wear their babies, of seeing the relief and sheer unadulterated joy in their eyes as they swaddle their babies close to their hearts and their baby, who has been crying for weeks without ceasing, quiets down and sleeps safe and secure upon his mother's chest, cradled in the carrier of her choice and swaddled in her sheer, deep love. A love that comes closest to the Love that Christ has for us.

I have a chance to become a postpartum doula. I have clicked with the instructor (who also happens to be a high ranking member of DONA), she has set up payment arrangements that will make this happen financially, and I know that it would continue to push me down the path that I already love: my ministry to mothers, namely young mothers (young as mothers, not necisarily by age...but that may be the case too). I feel that this is the ministry that God has for me. But I would need someone to accompany me from Tampa to Miami over Valentine's Day to watch my own childen while I am in class. I would need to gather up the money for food and gas and a hotel room. And, I would need to kidnap my dear friend who lives down that way for an afternoon so that we may catch up either on my trip down or back (Yes, Guenavere, I mean YOU! *hugs*).

However, I also want more children. I want to keep them close, and if we were to have another girl I wouldn't want to space them out much further than they would be now so that Heather and her potential little sister could be close enough in age to be playmates and build the fond memories of sisterhood that I never was able to build with my own 3 sisters.

So, I am confused. I am praying for God to reveal himself and His will to me, but I am uncertain how to read the Bible in searching for His guidance. Can anyone suggest something to me in this area?

So, that is my life right now in a nut shell. I am confused.

Oh well, I'm off to bed. Tomorrow is the Florida Flute Fair (err...today) and I am going...with Little Dude in tow...to attempt to sit through some master classes and test some flutes. Thank you all for taking the time to read my frustrated ramblings.

NEW BABY!!!!

One of my true BFFs just told me today that after 6 months of trying to conceive, they are PREGNANT! Baby L #2 is on the way due in October!!! YAY!!

I'm under orders of the new mommy-to-be to NOT get pregnant in the next few months so that I won't be on bed rest when she's due and can come and help her through bed rest, labor, postpartum, and breastfeeding. YAY!!!! I am SO excited! DH and I just love this couple, and we are over the moon for them.

Oh, and when her husband, a current SAHD, goes back to work, then depending on what's going on in my life they'd like me to consider watching their kids for them. YAY! A wee babe to wrap (even if it's not my own)!!! Oh yea, and the $ would be a help. LOL

So, to Jack and Jill...CONGRATS ON THE BELLY BEAN!!!

Pray for Baby Samuel

Some friends and I have started a new campaign.

It's not a presidential election campaign.

It's not a senatorial electoral campaign.

It's a campaign seeking prayer.

Prayer for a boy.

A little boy.

A 4 month old boy.

Baby Samuel.

Baby Samuel was diagnosed with retinoblastoma. That is, he has cancer in his eyes. Yes, eyes. plural. It started in his left eye, and is very obvious now that we know he has it (and had we known about RB we would have known), but has started spreading to his right eye. He's looking at loosing his left eye. The optical nerves of his right eye are intact and he still has vision there. So far, it's not spread beyond his eyes. They think they caught it early enough. But it could still spread to his brain. His mama is a friend of mine, whom I drove from FL to VA to help with breastfeeding back in September. This little guy has had a hard life medically since birth...and it's just getting harder.

We (his mama and I) know that God does all things for a reason. He has a reason for this, and Samuel's mama prays that God uses this to bring Samuel to Him as a strong man and that he uses Samuel to his Glory. Please join us in the complete healing of Baby Samuel. Not just for healing, but preservation of both eyes and restoration of his sight. We know that God can do all things, and that all things work to His glory, but we ask that God spares this little boy's eyes and sight...in addition to his life. Thank you.

To read more about Baby Samuel go here: http://www.myspace.com/prayforsamuel

Final Blog of 2007

Well, the year is about to wrap up. It has been one of the best years, and one filled with much growing.

I think every year is filled with both growing and learning experiences. God takes each and every day to teach us what He wants us to know, and to bring us closer to him. As you look over the past year, you can sometimes see what He's been teaching you...and what He's been doing.

In the past year:
My son has turned 1
My daughter has learned to use the potty
My daughter has decided that she MUST use each and every public (and some not-so-public ones) that we pass while we are on outings.
My husband and I have managed to make our marriage even stronger.
We suffered the very first loss of a child: the loss of an unborn baby.
I finally received the diagnosis as to the cause of the horrid hives that have been plaguing me for years.

I want to thank you all for sharing this year with me. I pray that God blesses each and every one of us in the year to come, and that He blesses us with His love and a peace that we find only through Him.

God Bless and Happy New Year!

Perfect Mothers

There's one thing I have learned from spending time around my loving, if not frustrating, family is that there is this: there are no perfect mothers, and every one is a perfect mother.

It takes all kinds of mothers to mother all kinds of children. Be the kind of mother you are!

That is, there isn't one set of rules to be a perfect mother. Ever child is different, every family is different (even among grown children becoming parents, their family is different than the one they grew up in), and every mother is different.

I got badgered all weekend long, my blouse wasn't nice enough, my son's hair is too long (even though we're growing it out since he IS half Native American), my son is too whiny, if I do "A, B, or C" then "X, Y, and Z" will happen (and X, Y, and Z are not "good" things). Rant after complaint and it drove me NUTS!

I apprecaite well meaning advice. The Good Lord knows I give out enough. But I take all advice with an open mind, an open heart, a grain of salt in some places, and with the spirit it is given: trying to help. I have learned SO MUCH from other mothers through their well meaning advice, most of it regarding what kind of mother I want to be, and how to make decisions that I feel is best for my family (such as how chiropractors and medical professionals are now saying babies shouldn't be in hard soled shoes until they are closer to 2 or 3). You would not BELIEVE the flack and nasty comments I get from people IN MY FAMILY as well as IN MY CHURCH regarding my son's footwear! HOLY SMOKES people! They are SHOES! I feel that they are best for him, I have seen him stumble around more in hard soled shoes and thus HIS FATHER and I TOGETHER made the decision to keep him in soft soled shoes! If I disclosed his shoe size I'm sure he'd have been bombarded with SHOES for Christmas!

I am still breastfeeding. There. It's in the open. Why am I? IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!! But, breastilk IS still better than cow's milk in a child...especially a child that is, um, ALLERGIC to cow's milk! "So give him soy milk, or rice milk," they say. WHY???? Why give him a product that isn't anywhere CLOSE to being as good for him as what I am giving him? Why put him through that emotional trauma of being forced to wean? He wants to, I want to...so we are. You don't like it? TOO FRACKEN BAD! MY CHILD, MY BOOBS, MY CHOICE!!!

So, if people could only see how every mother is different, every child is different, and every family is different and STOP GIVING MOTHERS FLACK! You want to give your advice? SURE! I'll continue to take it with an open heart and an open mind...and continue to learn about the kind of mother I want to be (and may NOT want to be). If I don't want your advice, I'll tell you...and I'd hope that others would do the same for me.

So, to all my friends who are mothers: YOU ARE AWESOME MAMAS!!! You all make the best decisions you can for your children. While I may feel that breastfeeding, cloth diapering, babywearing, and attachment parenting are the bottom line best, they are not right for every family. I understand this and it doesn't bother me in the least if you don't do these things.

So to those that don't do these things STOP GIVING ME A HARD TIME FOR DOING THEM! Go tend to your children (regardless of their ages) and let me tend to mine.

Now, for your viewing pleasure, a picture that captures the wonder of a child at Christmas.

Twas the Day AFTER Christmas...

and all through the house,
gifts are unwrapped,
and tossed gayly aside.

Boxes are opened,
the playroom a mess
and waiting for wee ones
to clean up said mess!

"MOMMY!" they whine,
"Can't we please,
just play with this one
just one time?"

I tell them no,
that the mess they must clean
and what do I get
but irritating whining!!!!

I threaten to toss
the old toys away
and to return
the new ones on day

They whine and they beg
but they clean up their best
and after all
that is all that I ask!

No one to be
a perfect child
I only ask
that the be not so WILD!!!

<>< <>< <><

So, can you tell that it's been crazy around here?

I had to bake 10 loaves of pumpkin bread, make 2 batches of homemade hot chocolate powder, package into jars (and decorate said jars), make 2 batches of cookies (and package them), and decorate 10 wicker baskets, sign cards, etc...all on Christmas Eve. We didn't get home until 11pm that night and I passed out while feeding the baby. Christmas morning wasn't any less wild. I insisted that we clean up the family room before we begin opening gifts so that we wouldn't loose anything. It worked, no lost toy parts. But we now have to go through the playroom and clean it up and make room for all the new toys and finish weeding out the ones to go to Goodwill.

All in all, though, it was a nice day. Sweet Pea was excited to be celebrating "Baby Jesus' Birthday" and kept asking when we were going to go to Baby Jesus Birthday Party, and asking what dresses she could wear to said party. I told her we would be going to Grandma and Abba's to have a special Christmas Day Dinner. That seemed to help ease her sadness over Baby Jesus not getting a party. At Grandma and Abba's they (that is, Sweet Pea and Little Dude) found they had a bike, trike, red wagon, and train table (to go w/ the train set opened a few hours before) waiting for them. We ended the day by taking the kids to the Drive In to see "Enchanted." It was a cute movie, but the kids were SOOOOOOO tired! They were both asleep before we got back onto the interstate.

So, how was YOUR Christmas?

The Bloodwork is In...

After the sever outbreak of hives I had in August, my allergist diagnosed me as having chronic hive (aka, Chronic Uritcaria or UC), told me to finish up the prednisone, and started
me on 5 antihistamines. He sent me in for blood work. Most of it was back at my last apt. but not all of it. He said my thyroid was fine, and my glucose levels were beautiful. We were waiting on the results of the testing to see if the cause was genetic or autoimmune.
My dad is adopted so we don't know anything about his history.

The results are in: my allergy levels were perfect, showing no real allergic reaction to anything. The autoimmune levels were high. Really high. I believe she put it as through the roof? I see my
allergist after the 1st of the year (no openings due to Christmas) and he will go over everything with me more.

I discovered the hives.com web page after getting the CU diagnosis. I
read the symptoms of auto immune and it lined up. So this isn't a big
surprise to me. Looking back, I've always thought I was allergic to
menstrual pads as I always break out in horrible hives during that
time. I guess it wasn't that.

So this is what I'm facing for the rest of my life. I get to start a regime of strong meds, I'll never be able to get private medical insurance to cover this part of my health (pre-existing condition), and we can't drop the $500 a month insurance we have right now w/ DH's work b/c I HAVE to have medical coverage for it all. The good news: during pregnancy the hives tend to go away. I am NOT going to be getting pregnant just to make the hives go bye-bye though. LOL

Christmas to Carseats

My local mom's group had our annual Christmas Party today (and shockingly enough, we called it a Christmas party...the muslim/jewish/athiest/agnostic members didn't care! LOL). As we usually do when we are together we got to talking about safety, and since we all do things out of the norm, we got to talking about extended rear facing in carseats. The conversation was started by someone saying, "Hey! Did any of you see the special CBS 10 did on car seat safety last month?" It went from there. LOL

Anyway, we got to talking about extended rear facing...since most of us practice this...and thus to the famous video on YouTube that shows pictures of toddlers rear facing, as well as footage from test crashes with carseats both rear and forward facing. I told them I have this video on my MySpace page, and decided to post it here as well for those that don't have a MS act to be able to view it (since my MS page is set to private: no seeing anything unless you are a friend).

So, here it is!



I probably won't keep it up long since YouTube videos start automatically...and that would get REALLY annoying after a while. LOL But, for those that asked to see it, here it is!

And, for your viewing pleasure, here are pics taken earlier this year w/ both kids rear facing. Heather at 3 and William at 1.



(to the friend that called and asked about turning her child forward or remaining rear, this is not geared towards you...it is in answer to a discussion I had earlier today w/ my mom's group. *hugs*)

Logan, Sky Angel

An online friend shared this with me, and I wanted to share it with y'all. It's SO touching. You might want to have a tissue in hand. This child is wise beyond his years.

Merry Tossmas

http://www.citizenlink.org/Stoplight/A000005834.cfm?eafref=1

I got this from another blogging friend of mine, Guinevere. She rocks and this link does too! Check it out!

I've Got a SECRET!!

But I'm not telling...yet that is.

Back to you're regularly scheduled nothingness. LOL

Text Messages...

...are evil. Sure, they allow people to have conversations without having to make phone calls...a plus in the corporate environment, but they also cost money. A lot of money. As my poor husband just discovered.

We use T-Mobile for our cellular service. We've been very happy with it. There's this really cool feature where you can dial #646#talk and a little screen will pop up telling you how many minutes you've used this billing cycle. It's VERY nice to make sure we don't go over. You can do the same thing for text messages, only dial #674#talk. My poor husband hasn't figured this out yet...or else he forgot.

I just got off the phone with customer service finidng out WHY we have an almost $300 cell phone bill. Some charges I'd forgotten about and was fine with. But they were small. I did find out my husband went over his monthly text "allowence" of 400 texts. By a lot.

A whole lot.

A REALLY whole lot.

He went 750 message OVER his 400.

At $0.10 a text.

He went over $75!!!!!! I about had heart failure.

...


...


...


and it gets BETTER!!!!


...


...


...


He went over THIS month too! That was just OCTOBER! He was already over THIS month to the tune of $50!!!!

...


...


...


...

The customer service rep was AWESOME and she got his plan bumped up and backdated so we won't get hit hard as well on this next bill. DH has to curb his texting...by a LOT!

SORRY!

Wow, things have been crazy around here. Where to start...

Well, after the miscarriage, I've just been out of sorts. Then, in September a very dear friend of mine gave birth to a son at 23 weeks 6 days. He only lived 15 hours, so that was hard. My heart broke for her, and it brought back all the pain of my miscarriage.

Oh, and right after my last post? I broke out in hives! I have been covered in hives for almost 3 months now! I drove up to VA on Sept. 1 to help a friend out with some breastfeeding problems. I got the next day, Sept. 2, I ended up in the ER up there because my eyes were swollen shut and my lip had swelled up to 5 x's it's normal size! UGH! I was put on 40 mg. of prednisone that my dr. here at home continued for 6 weeks! I ended up putting on all that weight I got off on weight watchers. *sigh*

So, for the past 3 months I have been dealing with a condition called Chronic Hives (www.chronichives.com) and I will probably deal with flare ups off and on the rest of my life. *sigh* I've been on 5 meds to control them, and have been living in a drug induced haze, functioning enough to care for my kids and get my homework done.

So, life has been chaotic! LOL

Good news to report:
Little Dude is now sleeping in his own crib! We've been waiting for this day, but not pushing it. We'd try to move him into his crib, but it wouldn't go well so we'd stop trying and wait some more. Now he's ready. I put him in his crib on Tuesday, and he started to protest. He cried for a few min. and I kept trying to comfort him, but he wouldn't calm down. Finally I very firmly told him to stop it, to lay down, be quiet, and go to sleep. That he is a big boy and needs to go to sleep. He didn't make another peep! He went right to sleep. The next day I added a crib toy to the side of his crib that he's been playing w/ outside of the crib. He started to protest, I did the same thing as the previous night only adding that he could play with his toy. It worked! He is now laying right down w/o making a noise and going right to sleep!

YAY for perseverance and listening to my boy! He is now ready. He's so ready, that last night he fell asleep in my bed nursing so I left him there. He woke up when Sweet Pea started throwing a fit and woke him up. Little Dude wouldn't go back to sleep, he wouldn't nurse, he kept crying and kicking and pushing me away. So, I put him in his crib and he rolled over and went right to sleep! LOL Tonight, not a whimper. He went right down.

I am so proud of my little man, but I'm also sad. My baby is growing up too fast. *sob*

Little Dude and Sweet Pea were doctors for Halloween. They were SO cute, but I haven't gotten pictures from my friend yet (Jack and Jill took pictures for me). I'll post them when I get them.
That's about it! I'll try and post more often now.

Children's Church

Yesterday was our church's "promotion" day. That is, children promote up to the next grade/age level of class. Sweet Pea moved from the nursery to Children's Church! It was a big step for her, but an even bigger one for Mommy. With Little Dude in arms, I chocked back tears as I took her to her class. She was SO proud! I thought she'd be timid but her friend Florida was in there so she ran in after her giggling. A true girl. LOL I sent DH a text message to let him know where she was and he got all misty over it. When class was over, she cam out with a painting she'd done in one hand, and a fist full of candy in the other.

So, all in all, it was a good day. Once again, I missed the sermon because Little Dude was hysterical in the nursery, and wouldn't sit still in the service. I know this will pass. Heather was this way and around her 2nd birthday she started getting easier.

Okay, off to brush my "big girl's" hair. :o)

Buh-Bye

Little Dude loves to go "buh-bye." He does this little variation on the Miss America wave, and runs to the door as fast as his chubby little 16 month old legs will carry him when he is asked if he wants to go "buh-bye." He loves to go "buh-bye" and love to shop even more.

I asked him a couple of days back if he wanted to go "buh-bye" and he added something to the routine. I'd just emptied my purse to put everything into the diaper bag (no need to haul around 2 bags) so he grabbed my purse for me.

Hair

Yup. I have nasty hair. Sure, it's BEAUTIFUL when it's long, and flowing. My dad and husband both love it. But I have to brush it every 5 min. to keep it LOOKING that way. It's thin. VERY thin. It's fine. VERY fine. And as I've learned:

thin + fine = easily tangled hair.

THIS is what I am talking about.


The sad part is, I was on the phone when DH took this picture. It took a couple of attempts because he as laughing so hard. Less than an hour later it was chopped off. LOL

So, for your viewing pleasure, the photojournal of my hair cut.

* * *

Here is my hair before it was cut. Please take note that it was still wet when these pictures were taken.

Hack hack...

The ponytail that was cut off. This was the longest piece, but about 15" total was taken off.

The final product.

At the end of the day, I am VERY happy with the hair cut. I've wanted to do this for 2 years, and I while it's still about 1/2" longer than I'd like, I love it!

Baby No More

Well, we found out on Wed. morning that we lost our little bean. I had a miscarriage. Thank you to everyone who has supported us.

The Results Are In

And I am, indeed, pregnant. OY!

Here's to hoping for an uneventful, healthy pregnancy and a healthy full-term baby. We're scared, but now that we've told our family feeling MUCH better. :o)

So, this is part of our mass announcement: WE ARE HAVING ANOTHER BABY!

:o)

The Woes of Fertility...

Yes, I said the woes of fertility, not fertility woes.

The difference you ask?

Fertility woes would be what those people unfortunate enough to experience fertility problems/issues would share.

I will share the woes of fertility. That is, the woes of a woman who is VERY fertile and married to a man who is equally fertile. I swear, my husband has Super Sperm! This man must share some genes with Clark Kent because his little swimmers can survive anything, and everything, and find an egg to fertilize against any odds placed before him. Heck, his Super Sperm managed to fertilize an egg with the IUD IN! Even dislodged (the IUD that is) that feat was incredible.

He got me pregnant while on the pill.

He got me pregnant 6 days before ovulation (enter Little Dude).

I get pregnant if he so much as LOOKS at me and I am anywhere within a whisper of a thought of ovulating.

And, he may have done it again. It's still too early to tell for sure, and I am PRAYING that I am not, but the early early sighs are all there. *sigh*

We are practicing the rules of Natural Family Planning. Since I've gotten pregnant on BCPs (birth control pills) once before any form of hormonal birth control is not an option. I am also allergic to (get ready, this is a long list):

Latex condoms - I break out in hives 2" across in my nether regions. YOUCH!
Spermicides - again, 2" hives in my nether regions. *shudders*
sponges - they hurt me so much we can't even have, well, you know.
polyurethane condoms - again, hives, nether regions, OUCH!
sheep skin condoms - they're only something like 70% effective...and DH has Super Sperm. Yea...THAT'S an "oops" waiting to happen!

So, knowing my body (yay for that), temping, charting, sticking my fingers up my nether regions to check cervical placement, texture, and opening (or lack there of) is the only thing that works for us. And we follow them religiously. (please note: NFP or FAM is not that bad at all...in fact I LOVE it because I know my body unlike ever before)

Some of the rules state:
no BDing (aka: Baby Dancing...do I REALLY need to explain that one???) after cycle day 8. Sperm can live up to 5 days before fertilizing an egg. And DH has Super Sperm...remember?

You are safe once you are 3 DPO (days post ovulation).

During that fertile period, either use spermicides (which can alter the cervical mucous), condoms, or abstain. DH has Super sperm; we abstain.


Enter my 2nd cycle postpartum. I've had one visit from the witch herself so far.

We enjoyed knowing what was going on, and had some 'fun' on cycle day 7. We are following the "rules" right? I started showing fertile signs that night. *sob*

5 days later, 4 days earlier than ever before, my body decides to release it's eggie. God, you really DO have a sense of humor, right? 5 days. REGULAR sperm can live up to 5 days. DH has Super Sperm. *ensue sobbing*

My temps look "normal". Enter 8 DPO. I have a temp dip, MAJOR cramping, and nausea and headaches. All signs of implantation.

Enter 9 DPO. My temp not only goes back up, it goes up to it's highest temp yet. Yea, a GREAT sign...if you're TRYING to get pregnant.

God....you DO have a sense of humor...right?

And this is where I am at: 9 DPO, face breaking out like a teenager, still nauseous, and scared out of my ever lovin' mind. I know that this dip "can" occur in cycles that do not result in conception. I dart off to Google: "Charting Temperature Dip 8 days ovulation". The results....not good. Implantation dip is the result. *ensue sobbing* I Google: "Implantation Dip" and find that it's not a common thing in cycles resulting in pregnancies, but when there IS a temp. dip like the one I had the chances of it NOT being implantation and resulting in a pregnancy are startling. 11%! There's only an 11% chance that I am NOT baking baby no. 3!!!!! God: sense of Humor...c'mon! Cut me some slack!!!!

Oy Vey! (to quote a dear internet friend of mine)

So yes...the woes of fertility.

*back to crying, panicking, and obsessively trying to figure out when to start taking HPTs...and desperately praying that "the witch" comes*

Maybe I'll watch "Schlinder's List" as a distraction...

How to Be a Liberal

I am a staunch conservative, and tend to tick people off w/ how conservative I am. So, some may not like this, but I wanted to post this anyway. :o)

How to be a Liberal

1. You have to be against capital punishment but support killing babies in the womb.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands
of Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain only.

12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger (Founder of Planned Parenthood) and Gloria Steinem (originator of Natl Organization of Women) are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

16. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

17. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

18. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.

GOD BLESS AMERICA (ooops, can't do that either!)

Bedrooms and Playrooms

Up until now, Little Dude and Sweet Pea have had separate rooms. This seemed silly since I ALWAYS find them in the same room playing together. Little Dude adores his "Sissy" and "Sissy" adores "Lillum" (as she calls him). They are inseparable, and Little Dude is constantly found in his sister's shadow.

Since DH and I are both in school full time, and both kids bedrooms are perpetual disaster areas that resemble an Iraqi battle zone, we decided to move both kids into one room. It seemed simple: take down the crib that LD has yet to sleep in and move SP's bed and LD's bed (he sleeps on a mattress on the floor by her bed) into his room along with SP's dresser and put all toys into SPs old (bigger) room.

It would be simple...

...or so I thought.

I spent a good 5 hours this afternoon working on this move. It's done. And my back hurts. And both kids are now asleep in their new room, and DH's laptop is now set up in the office portion of the new office/playroom. It's GREAT! When my best friend comes down for a few days (tomorrow) I have a place to put her and her kids, DH and I now have a room that we can work in undisturbed, and the kids have a place to go and play w/o trashing their bedroom!!!! YAY!!!!

I'll let you know how it goes in the days/weeks to come.

What we did....July 1, 2007

So, our actual anniversary was Sunday, July 1. We were married on July 1, 2002 in Las Vegas, Nevada. It was FUN! It was AMAZING! And, we don't have a single picture to show for it! ROFL

Anyway, DH and I had this cool day planned to celebrate in ways that would be special for us and hold special meaning without breaking the bank. But, God had other plans. LOL

Originally we were going to have a wedding to renew our vows since we never had a wedding (we got married in Las Vegas) but after DH's pay cut in April we were unable to afford it.

So, we were going to go to Busch Gardens and Adventure Island sans children to actually get to ride rides and do the things we did while dating/courting (we had more of a courtship than dating because of how long distance we were the entire relationship).

After we dropped Sweet Pea and Little Dude off at my parents' house, we got to Busch Gardens and the OVERFLOW parking was overflowing! We realized we'd have time to ride one ride before having to get to dinner and go get the kids. So, we decided to go see a movie.

We walked into the theater, got snacks, sat down and my mom called. Little Dude was inconsolable and had been this way for over an hour...I needed to get back!!! ARG!!!!!!!

So, DH (VEEEEEEERY frustrated) and I drove back to get LD. We ended up taking him with us to the movie (this time at a theater in town...we'd got to the movie theater we went to on our first date originally). We saw "Live Free or Die Hard" and LD actually did really well. He ended up eating a TON of candy just to keep him quiet, but he did really well over all. 3/4 of the way through the movie he fell asleep nursing and that was it for him for the evening.

After the movie (9:15pm by this point) we drove across the street to Olive Garden and had dinner courtesy of my grandparents (they gave us a gift card for our birthdays the end of May). He slept in the stroller the whole time and DH and I had the best dinner we've had in a VERY long time. We got to talk, we got to hold an actual conversation, we got to be honest with each other. We talked about the biggest of the hardships we've endured over the past 5 years and how we were honestly feeling at the time...and how still, through it all, we would do it all over again. We had a WONDERFUL time, and ended up bringing half our dinner home.

Oh...and DH and I discussed my cooking. That first year it was horrid...and now, well, he
told me last night that he loves my cooking. In fact, he didn't like the Chicken Parmesan because he says mine is better!!!! ROFL

That was our "big" 5th year anniversary. And, you know what, it was 100% US! It was all things that WE love to do! I will say again, I LOVE THIS MAN!!!

5 YEARS as Mrs. F

5 years ago I married the love of my life. I use the term "DH" to refer to my husband. DH means Darling Husband or Dear Husband. My husband is Dear to me. And over the past 5 years he's only become even more Dear to me. I love this man. I love him more than I can ever explain or begin to put into words. Hmmm...maybe I should read some Shakespearean sonnets...maybe he could describe the depth of my love for this man???

They say that the first 5 years are the hardest. They say that if you can survive the first 5 years then you are in the "safe zone" (as safe as that zone is in today's 50%+ divorce rate). The past 5 years have been...well...our marriage. That is, we've gone through the military and all it's highs and lows (although I'd be happy if he went back in). We've been through military discharge, difficult pregnancy, an injury on DH's part, the premature birth of our child, financial ruin...over and over and over and over....and still going....again. We've been through a 2nd pregnancy and all that entailed (during the 1st trimester I threw him out of the house as well as chucked a pillow and TV remote at his head...POOR DH!!!!), the birth of our 2nd child, and the amazing 1st year of this second child (Little Dude). We've gone through multiple jobs, unemployment, a secure job, moving on average every 6 months, and now school.

God is good. God is wise. God is AWESOME! God created this many JUST FOR ME!!!! MAN did God know what he was doing!

So, at the end of the day, I am thankful for this amazing man that God gave me. I pray that He (God) continues to remind me of the amazing things that my husband has done and has survived with me through all the times to come where I can't stand this man yet love him so deeply. And, in 45 years....come back. I'm sure I'll have an even more amazing tale to tell.