Politics and Personal Responsibility

This time, every 4 years, is filled with politics. There's name calling, bashing, mud slinging, and even bandwagon riding. This year has been even more so because with our first African American candidate who is a real contender for the office of President of the United States has caused many heated arguments. If a person does not support him, they get the "You're just racist" comments thrown at them (Yes, I've even had them thrown at me...as I stand there with my BI-RACIAL children!!!). It's been nasty.

Here's where I stand. We live in a society that pushes "self." All that matters is that "I" feel good, nothing matters unless the individual is happy. That brings back to mind President J. F. Kennedy said: "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country." We live in an era where neighbors no longer help each other out (unless it is convenient), and people will do anything to climb higher than the other person. In short, the Christian principals that this country was founded upon (brotherly love, kindness, the fruits of the spirit) are gone, or fading fast. So much of our society would leave our founding fathers rolling in their graves. Our society lacks moral absolutes, and our founding fathers founded this country upon absolutes. Just reading the Declaration of Independence shows this.

"When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. "

They didn't say, "We think that..." or "We feel that...", they said "We hold these TRUTHS". A truth is an absolute, it's not open for interpretation. Our society is lacking these truths, the absolutes. It's all become "What ever you think is right is right." Fewer and fewer people are willing to stand up and say, "Enough is enough...this is WRONG and there is no negotiating this fact."

I watched a Presidential Candidate discussion led by the pastor of Saddleback Church in CA (he is also the author of "The Purpose Driven Life"). He had a list of questions for both candidates (Sen. Obama and Sen. McCain) on morals, religious faith, and their personal character.

I will admit, that I was impressed by some of what Sen. Obama had to say, but there was still far too much that had me leery. For instance, one question was "Do you believe evil exists and what should we do about it." His response was that yes, he does believe evil exists (yay there) but (uh-oh...buts are never good) he doesn't believe that we should eradicate it, that it is something best left for God, and also that evil is subjective. I have issues with this. Why are we called to be spiritual warriors if we are to just sit back, negotiate with evil, and wait for God to do something? No, I'm not saying that God doesn't do anything...I am saying that God himself says that we are to be warriors, we are to fight evil. Even regarding war, God says there is a time for war and a time for peace. So, while people who believe in more of a pacifist way would like this answer, it did not sit well with me.

Sen. McCain, without hesitation, said that Evil DOES exist and we are not to tolerate it. We are not to tolerate the evil that was done on September 11, 2001 and that we are to stop this evil before any more people are harmed. This answer, I liked.

The questioning continued, and everything Sen. McCain said kept coming back to emphasizing how people need to stop thinking of themselves and start thinking of others. He criticized the government for telling people to go shopping, or go on vacation, after September 11 happened, and said that it should have encouraged people to join the Peace Corps or the military to help stop these people who killed thousands of our innocent people. I literally applauded this (as did my sweet little son who was sitting on my bed next to me).

So, the foundation of Sen. McCains views (and not all of them I agree with) seems to be simple: stop serving self, and start serving others. So, in the end of it all, after much research on my part, this man will get my vote come election day (which, ironically, is also my due date).

Sugar, Sugar, and a Big Ol' Crash

I was FINALLY able to take my glucose test today. After the fiasco with the lab last week, my MW's office called and we decided to do the test there in their office. They were appalled at all the hoops both them and I would have to jump through to get the lab to let me do the test with anything other than glucola. *gag*

So, I ate a big protein and veggie dinner last night, and went in today. I drank my 10 oz. of pure grape juice, and then saw the midwife (MW). After that I still had 15 min. so i was able to go outside and power walk for 10 min. pushing DS in the stroller to help burn off some sugar. I came back in when the 1 hr. was up and went back to have my blood drawn.

Well, I was dehydrated. Badly. I'd not eaten in 17 hours, and had only had grape juice to drink in several hours. So, it REALLY REALLY REALLY hurt when she stuck the needle in my vein (in my best vein too, which was odd). I was so dehydrated that the blood was thick and dark and flowed slowly into each of the 3 vials, hurting more and more by the second. The more it hurt, the more dizzy I got. When she was done, I sat there for a second until the room stopped spinning. I then went into the bathroom to pee one more time, and when I got out I was so dizzy that I was able to call out for help before just collapsing on the floor. The poor nurses started freaking out. I was sweating bullets in a cold sweat, and all the color was gone from my face. They frantically got the midwife who laid me down, had them bring a blanket to put under my head, and stroked my head and face while I laid there. They said that I passed out for a moment there. Once I was lying down I started feeling better, and they brought me a wheel chair to wheel me outside. My MW clinic is inside the hospital, which has parking we have to pay for at each visit, or complimentary valet parking (which we utilize as tipping the attendants is cheaper than the cost of the parking garage that runs us almost $5 a visit otherwise).

A nurse wheeled me right out to the car, and gave my DH and I instructions to stop on the way home and get big protein meal...no sugars or I'd have another sugar crash like that.

The kicker: by the time they drew my blood, b/c i'd been fasting (like they directed) it was 17 hours without eating. Man, if this is how I was with just a 1 hr. test, I know there's no way I'll get through the 3 hour if I fail this one. I'm praying the fasting, grape juice, and walking will do the trick and I'll pass.

Breast Is Best...and a Protest

I stumbled upon this site through another blog I was reading (whom I will not link to at this time to avoid any unwanted attention going to her blog in a difficult time). I saw this in the archives of the site and just HAD to share the link. Those of you who support breast feeding will enjoy this virtual protest and cyber "thumbing the nose" at Facebook from back in October of last year (2007). So, for the benefit of lactating moms every where, and without further ado, I bring you the video montage.

http://www.leagueofmaternaljustice.com/montage.html

My Vices

I am a woman of many faults. I am working on them, but they (my faults) still keep biting me in the bum.

One is that I care too much about my friends. I take their pain and frustration to heart and when I see them suffering, or hurting, I want to fix the problem. I guess I'm too empathetic. This has it's good side, in that when my friends are happy, and something good happens in their lives I am able to rejoice whole heatedly. I tell everyone I know that something good has happened to a friend (they've had a baby, fallen in love, bought a new car, child reached a new milestone, etc...you get the picture). When they make a bad choice, or something bad happens to them, I typically turn to my DH to vent because I am so distraught. I am not the type of person who can bottle my feelings up. I guess you could say that I wear my emotions on my sleeve. (This is much to my husband's chagrin and has been the source of much frustration for him as well) When I am emotional about a friend's problems, and venting to my poor unsuspecting (although by now I suspect that he is not so unsuspecting) husband is not enough, I"ll turn to a few people close to me whom I care about and I know can offer me either an ear to vent to or can offer me wise counsel. I crave wise counsel and try not to make a decision until I have gotten feedback on the situation from a few select people such as: My mom and dad, Jack and Jill, and a only one or two others. When I am REALLY distraught, I may allow a little bit to slip out to a few other friends who will only be an ear for me...but I really really try not to do this (and it really does slip out, so I guess "allow" is not the best word to use here).

I can keep secrets when they need to be kept, but I am like an emotional volcano and when I get too emotional I must vent. I can't always vent here about people because I do not want to make my frustrations/pain that is another person's pain/poor decision public to the whole of the world wide web.

I am also very dramatic. I believe this stems from the same emotional charge that is effecting me now. I respond so strongly to my emotions, that I respond very dramatically. I guess I should learn to be a Vulcan and show no emotions and work off of facts alone...no, that wouldn't work. But how do I find a balance?

Sadly, this trait has come to bite me in the bum, and I fear I have lost some friends today. If they read this blog, I want them to know it was never my intent to cause harm, and to possibly understand where I am coming from to better understand why things are as they are. I love my friends dearly, and can not stand the thought of a life without them. This is why I do so much for them, why I help my friends (all of them) as much as I can. I'm a "fix it" kind of person. I see a problem, then I want to fix it. I see pain, I want to "fix it" (or heal it). I would take the pain of those I love and make it my own if it would ease their pain.

So, seeing that my poor choice in "venting" method has cost me so much, I am left with two choices:

Harden my heart to my friends, and take more of my husband's approach of "if it doesn't effect my family, I won't invest emotionally in it" (even though he sill tries to help out those he cares about, he limits his emotional investment)

or

Find another way of venting...of releasing this emotional build up. But how? What can I do? I just don't know!

I see now that my previous method of venting was not only a poor choice, but also un-Biblical. I love the Lord with all my heart, I long to be like Him. I believe he gave me such a strong empathy towards my friends for a reason, but I need to learn how to harness it and use it in a way that will not go against His will.

If anyone has advice on how I can vent without harming those that I so dearly love, I am open to suggestions. I also ask my friends to PLEASE call me on it if I begin to fall back on this vice. I seek accountability and pray that I can humbly accept it when it (accountability) is given.

To those whom I have hurt, I offer you my whole hearted, most sincere apologies and pray that some time in the future you can offer me your forgiveness. To those whom I have not hurt, please know that I love you all deeply. I consider you all to be as family.

Okay, so this is I think the second in a series of "my vices" blogs I've posted this year...if not, it's the second MAJOR vice/flaw that God has brought before me (painfully) to work on. The other, being negative all...the...time. I'm still working on that one, and hope that I am improving there too.

You Know You're a Floridian When...

Being a 5th generation Floridian, I can TOTALLY relate. I thought my fellow Floridian readers would enjoy this as well.

<>< <>< <><

You know you're a Floridian if...


Socks are only for bowling.

You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes.

A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but
everything to do with shade.

Your winter coat is made of denim.

You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.

You're younger than thirty but some of your friends are over 65.

Anything under 70 degrees is chilly.

You've driven through Yeehaw Junction.

You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.

Every other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005.

You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for.

You dread love bug season.

You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne.

You know what a snowbird is and when they'll leave.

You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.

'Down South' means Key West ...

Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings and church, but you HAVE worn flip flops to church before.

You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.

You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.

A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.

You know the four seasons really are: hurricane season, love bug season, tourist season and summer.

You've hosted a hurricane party.

You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochee and Micanopy.

You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat, than have a
boat yourself.

You were 25 when you first met someone who couldn't swim.

You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and New Years.

You recognize Miami-Dade as ' Northern Cuba.

You not only forward this but you understand it!

Fun for Kids!

Another comment that should probably make it to "The List" prompted this post.

My kids are playing with play dough right now, and I thought it might be fun to tray and make some home made goo or slime for them later today, so I ran a search for "goo" recipes. I found this one, and we're going to give it a shot! I'll let you know how it turns out

http://www.sciencebob.com/experiments/polymer.html

To make one golf ball size batch of slime you will need:

Elmer's glue (most kinds of white craft glue will work)
2 disposable cups
Food coloring (you pick the color)
Water
Borax (available at most large grocery stores near the laundry detergent)
Small plate, dish or plastic wrap.
A plastic spoon (for stirring)
A tablespoon (for measuring)
What to do:

Beforehand: Mix about a teaspoon of the Borax into a cup of water and stir (it usually doesn't fully dissolve)

SLIME TIME!

Fill the plastic cup with about 1/2 inch of glue
Add 20 ml (three tablespoons) of water to the glue and stir
Add a few drops of food coloring and stir again
Add two tablespoons of the Borax solution and stir well.
Lift out the spoon with the goo and place it on the dish
Let it sit for about 30 seconds and then pull it off the stick and play with it!

That's all for now!

P.S. If you're wondering what I said that didn't make it to "The List" it was, "Get the play dough out of your ear!" LOL

The "List"

The things we say as parents, that we would never say otherwise. The list can be fun, so feel free to add to it in the "comments" section.

I bought my kids a bag of mixed nuts to share in the car one day. A MUCH healthier snack than chips, or cookies, or french fries, and I knew they'd enjoy it just as much so I was proud of myself for making such a wise decision regarding my children's dietary needs.

Heather took William's bag of nuts away from him.

"Heather, quit playing with your brother's nuts and give them back to him!"

Yes, I actually said it.

It gets better, though.

William was throwing handfuls of nuts from his bag across the car, and giggling gleefully.

"William, quit playing with your nuts and put them in your mouth!"

I...about...died. As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I had to work hard to choke back the laughter that threatened to spill forth and cause my son to continue "playing with his nuts."

Of course, there's, "Leave the cat alone, and quit trying to lock his head in the box" with the box being a Sterilite container he was trying to close, with ONLY the cat's head inside. But that's still not as funny as the nuts comments.

Ah, the things we say...

He called the COPS!

Okay, so William had a late nap today, falling asleep on the way home from the mall and sleeping until 7pm (from 5pm to 7pm). Thus, he was up late. This is not normal for him, and it is frustrating b/c DH and I are trying to keep an eye on him while we work on our individual homework assignments, which is why we wait until the kids are sleeping to attempt any homework...trying to get it done while the kids are awake is a mute point...a lost cause...b/c we just can't focus on homework AND provide adequate supervision to a 4 yr old and a 2 yr old. I'm sure you all can relate. LOL

So, while I'm sitting here on my bed working on a paper regarding the roll of police officers in the court room and the ways in which their testimonies can impact a case (yes, blah..bland...can I go to sleep yet? ROFL I'm a Criminal Justice major, and will be graduating in 4 weeks!!!), William is sitting at the foot of my bed playing with some toys.

My phone rings. I look up and William has it. Okay, no biggie. I have T-Mobile and Myfaves, so if he hits talk, it'll just call DH. Thus, I've never been concerned about him getting a hold of my phone. He handed me the phone, and I didn't recognize the number. Since it was 10:30 at night, and I have a friend whose 30 wks pregnant and been battling pre-term labor, I figured I should answer just to make sure it wasn't her in labor.

IT WAS THE POLICE!!! The Police Officer informed me that they'd just received a 911 call from this number, and was wondering if everything was okay. I informed him that yes, everything was fine and my son had gotten a hold of my phone. I thanked him for calling back and looking out for us this way, but that everything was okay and I'd be placing my phone out of my son's reach. He said he understood, that it happens all the time, and wished me a good evening.

I hung up, hollered for DH, and then scrolled through my dialed calls, baffled at how a 2 yr old could manage to dial the numbers "911" (when I let him have my phone WITH supervision, he normally hits numbers that are next to each other, not so far apart). He dialed 112. The entry registered it as an emergency number. I've never heard of this before, but am CERTAINLY going to be keeping my keypad locked from now on. Geez!

So, my 2 yr old son called the cops on me. Boy, I certainly hope this isn't a sign of things to come. LOL

Okay, now back to your regularly scheduled evenings (and I'm headed back to my paper).

Cloth Diaper GIVEAWAY!

For my Cloth Diapering readers, check out this give away!

http://charpenette.blogspot.com/2008/08/free-for-you-friday.html

10 Worst Baby Products Ever

I got a kick out of this, and though my fellow mommies (and human beings for that matter) would get a kick out of this.

Lets face it...cold, lifeless hands to cuddle your baby? *gag*

http://www.creativeminorityreport.com/2008/07/ten-worst-baby-products-ever.html

More Jeff Dunham

This guy HAS to be the world's best ventriloquist. This is a blooper thing, and is all "off the cuff." MAN is this guy good, and boy is this bit funny. ROFL

Christmas in July

For your viewing pleasure (and to help distract you from the heat) here is: Achmed the Dead Terrorist singing "Jingle Bombs."

Using a Wrap

Since there is so much interest here on using a wrap (like the Moby Wrap), I thought I would share some information, links, etc.

First, Here is why wraps rock! http://youtube.com/watch?v=iPojAygVqV4

There are some basic carries, so you can search YouTube for them.
FWCC - Front Wrap Cross Carry
Kangaroo Carry
FCC - Front Cross Carry
BWCC - Back Wrap Cross Carry
Ruck Carry - an easy back carry
SHBC - Secure High Back Carry

Here are some links to videos on how to do carries with a wrap, listed by the type of carry they teach.

FWCC
http://youtube.com/watch?v=knkiOnBdFB0 - this is an EXCELLENT video. The only thing I don't like about it is the dad only ties the wrap once, and he should tie it off (when done wrapping) with a double knot for safety.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=9ZE1L2avn5M
http://youtube.com/watch?v=42yXjkoXl34

Kangaroo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QjABSUlY-zU - a quick instruction on this carry, no sound
http://youtube.com/watch?v=6VTZ3M6HVeo - MUCH more detailed instruction on this carry. There's no sound, but it's in German anyway so sound wouldn't benefit most of us much anyway. LOL

FCC - This is an easy carry to do, you can leave it tied while you run errands and just pop baby in and out as needed
http://youtube.com/watch?v=unWZK8qaKa0


Nursing
http://youtube.com/watch?v=z7y8xEQB-xY
http://youtube.com/watch?v=TLduLJFSJn4
http://youtube.com/watch?v=UG0vfnfSy-U - I'm not sure what type of wrap she's using as most wraps don't have rings, but this will work simply by loosening the knot.


Hip Carry
http://youtube.com/watch?v=_Z41I-jVO8s

BWCC - There are a LOT of variations on this carry, as well as a multitude of ways of getting baby on your back. If you don't like the method of getting baby up in one video, watch another...but the concepts of how to actually wrap it may be better in some than others or may be easier for some to understand than others. Back carries are highly subjective to individual preferences. Also, with this carry, you can use ruck straps instead of crossing your chest if you prefer. Larger busted women usually prefer this method.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=jbKdxwkBiRo
http://youtube.com/watch?v=KppGN5Zy_aw
http://youtube.com/watch?v=z2e6DQTEUic
http://youtube.com/watch?v=3cy45hfsIt0
http://youtube.com/watch?v=jeS5Uqrq508

Ruck
http://youtube.com/watch?v=hA_IXe0yg5w - done with a newborn, she ties this Tibetan which is how I prefer to tie my BWCC
http://youtube.com/watch?v=hwi3cddZl0U
http://youtube.com/watch?v=HdyqImGegHM
http://youtube.com/watch?v=qRy353K4Rbw
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wsewka-UpkA

SHBC - this is an advanced carry
http://youtube.com/watch?v=6QH8_EjyFAM
http://youtube.com/watch?v=7zEpAOgYnqM - this is done with a newborn, so anyone who is good with the wraps can do it with a child or baby of any age.


For something just crazy, watch this: http://youtube.com/watch?v=iNdNFkIEmkY While this video is being made, she's pregnant with TWINS!!!

Okay, I think this should be sufficient for most everyone. If you are still confused on some of the carries, I'll see if I can't get DH to act as a camera man for me and try and make my own video for you. :o) Enjoy, mamas!

Using a Ring Sling

A lot of people lately have been coming to me seeking help (online) using different types of carriers. I decided to compile a list of YouTube videos I've found that are helpful for all of the common carries and/or problems with each type of carrier and post them here to keep them central and easily accessable. So, if you are having problems or considering using a ring sling, here you go!

Tummy to Tummy - Newborn

Nursing

Tummy to Tummy (legs out)

Troubleshooting: Snug Top Rail

Rings Too Low

Troubleshooting: Spread Fabric on Back

Baby Too Low

Troubleshooting: Baby's Knees Below Bottom

Sling on Neck

Troubleshooting: Spreading Fabric around Rings

Hip Position

Kangaroo Position

Cradle Position (for Newborns)


The direct URLS

http://youtube.com/watch?v=HdP_KcN20uw - Tummy to Tummy (newborn)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=XCIgzjJjAT4&feature=related - Nursing
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Bkb9vZklVpk&feature=related - Tummy to Tummy (legs out)
http://youtube.com/watch?v=h-tPzVZ4TWY&feature=related - Troubleshooting: Snug Top Rail
http://youtube.com/watch?v=it-TH7cC1RU&feature=related - Rings Too Low
http://youtube.com/watch?v=kQ3LZFyAbF8&feature=related - Troubleshooting: Spread Fabric on Back
http://youtube.com/watch?v=n2cbslV1Je4&feature=related - Baby Too Low
http://youtube.com/watch?v=qRt2Uhe0b3A&feature=related - Troubleshooting: Baby's Knees Below Bottom
http://youtube.com/watch?v=M250bvhQ7Kc&feature=related - Sling on Neck
http://youtube.com/watch?v=Sebvt9P2XjM&feature=related - Troubleshooting: Spreading Fabric around Rings
http://youtube.com/watch?v=qk85BnDF-j8&feature=related - Hip Position
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wvJp8FyZ1Mk&feature=related - Kangaroo Position
http://youtube.com/watch?v=vvyQE5ij-os&feature=related - Cradle Position (for Newborns)

Don't Drink the Water!

The wisdom of the farmer.....

I thought this might make for a good laugh. Thank you hubby!

Don't Drink the Water

Near Fredericksburg, Texas, where there is a large German-speaking
population, a farmer walking down a country road notices a man drinking
from his pond, with his hand.

The farmer shouts: 'Trink das Wasser nicht. Die Kuhen haben dahin
gesheissen.' (Which means: 'Don't drink the water, the cows have
[crapped] in it.')


The man shouts back: 'I'm from New York and just down here campaigning
for Obama, I can't understand you. Please speak in English.'

The farmer says: 'Use two hands, you'll get more

Stretched Too Thin

I'm going to vent for a few moments. Some may take offense to my venting, but I have to do this (vent) for my own sanity and health as well as for the health of my husband, children, and unborn baby. I'm not a confrontational person. In fact, I go out of my way to avoid confrontation at all costs. I am also the type of person who will do anything and everything to help out those I care about. But I've finally reached my limits.

I guess you could say my desire to help out those whom I care about has come back to bite me in the butt. I've been helping a very dear friend out for the past 6 weeks by housing her and one of her children in my home. I've allowed my home to be turned into upheaval, my children's lives to become invaded (although in many good ways as well as they have had to learn to share as never before), and far too much unneeded strain to be placed upon my marriage and relationship with my husband. My husband is like me in that he also wants to help those whom he care about and so he was on board with helping this friend of mine. The situation is far from ideal in the best of times, but throw in the fact that I am pregnant and things just get harder. I've had to balance tending to my own children, meeting their emotional needs, my usual housework, and limited time with my husband only to have shoveled upon my shoulders coping with my friend's child, expectations that I help her with her child in every way, the added housework from the presence of another family, and I won't even get into the financial impacts it's had on our budget that is already stretched so thin we can only manage to pay our bare essential monthly bills with GREAT juggling (due to a summer of pay loss from one of my husband's sources of income). In short, it's been 6 weeks of hell in many way.

And this is just meeting the needs of one friend.

I've had another friend who had a baby and wanted me there with her through her labor. I did so. And came home to get only 3 hours of sleep due to the presence of small children in my home (namely one very loud child). While my friend apologized for her son disrupting my much needed sleep (sleep needed if I wasn't pregnant), she failed to do what most people would have: take the child out for a few hours so I can sleep.

I've had friends texting me and calling me late at night needing advice or help on things such as car seats, breast pumps, nursing bras, pumping, breast feeding, labor, birth, and much much much more. These are not unusual calls/texts for me to receive, but throw in the sheer chaos of my home, the fact that I am pregnant, I am sleep deprived, and have not had a place to be my sanctuary to go before the Lord in quiet and read my Bible, pray, or even just have peace and I'm stretched too thin.

I am finally standing up. I am saying no. My mom has been encouraging me to say no for a while now, and I guess it's taken me having ongoing painful braxton hicks contractions, running away from my own home to avoid confrontation and chaos, and strained relations with my husband (b/c I'm not the only woman in my home who is begging for his time and friendship...poor, poor, amazing man...Thank you God for SUCH an amazing man!!) for me to start saying No.

No.


No.


No.


I will NOT watch someones child at midnight when I am sleep deprived, tending to my own sick children, AND working on homework. It's not my responsibility. Find another option. (if the above factors are not in play, then yes...I'll most likely watch anyone's child)


No.


I will NOT get up at 6am to help you pick out a car seat. I will sit down at the computer at 8am or 9am after I have woken up on MY terms, cuddled with my children and husband, fed my children and myself, and am sitting down to the computer.


No.


I will NOT drive across town to help you (a proverbial you) with what ever else mundane need is that you have.



I. Am. Done. I finally realize that I need rest. I need peace. I need calm serenity. I need to be alone with my husband. I need to be alone with my children. I need to cuddle with my children, to be in the best form I can be to tend to their medical needs when they arise. I need to rest for the very life of my unborn baby. I need to be able to resolve an argument with my husband without an outside audience. I need to be able to clean my kitchen without choking back language that I do NOT want my children hearing b/c I resent that I am (once again) cleaning up mess that is not our own. I need to not find that I am spending more time going before the Lord seeking repentance and forgiveness for the un-Christ-like thoughts and feelings I have been having than I do seeking his desire for my life and the life of my children. I need to be able to work on my homework in peace.

My husband can only help me so much. He works full time, is a full time student, and helps out around the house as much as he can. He does not have time or energy to cater to any additional needs, and I do not need to find myself having to beg for more from him because I'm helping everyone else under the sun. I have no family to take my children for a few hours so I can sleep, and no friends have offered to step up and help me out in any way shape or form despite my helping them out in every way I possibly can. No one. Out of all my friends.

I don't expect my friends to help me out. I offer to help (and yes, it IS offering...genuine offers from a truly genuine heart seeking to help others...not some false sense of obligation) because I want to help. I don't expect any offers in return. But you know, once in a while just the offer would be nice. Even if I don't accept the offer, just getting one is nice. We mothers need to help one another.

So, for the time being...I'm done. I will continue to offer to help in any way that I can, but I will not allow myself to feel guilty for not offering, and anyone that tries to play the guilty card will be shown the door, or politely have the conversation ended. If I think I can help, I will. I still feel this is how God wants me to minister to those around me. But I will cut back. And I will instead put that time back into my daughter's education, my children's spiritual upbringing, reading the Bible with my children, my relationship with my husband, and more important than ANYTHING else, my relationship with my Lord and Savior.

I guess more than anything else, I just needed to get this off of my chest. I know that only one person really reads my blog, but I still needed to get it out. If anyone reads this and wants to discuss it, remember that I am not a confrontational person, and avoid fighting at all costs. I won't allow my stress level to rise any higher than it already is and endanger my health or the health of my unborn baby. Discussions are fine, but if it starts to get mean or angry, I will end the conversation.

I love my friends. I love you all VERY much. I pray for all of you daily, that God will protect you and your families, that He will Bless you and your families. I pray that no one will take this blog the wrong way. I am venting. Venting. Nothing more, nothing less. Venting because I have to get this off my chest, and putting it down where anyone can read it makes it seem more...real; like my decision is more resolute.

Again, I love you all and thank you all for your friendship.

Army Wife

DH has always said he wanted to go back into the military. He's always wanted to do this, but had been told early on after his discharge from the Marine Corps that he would have to start out in the reserves in any branch. The goal of his education was to eventually become a commissioned officer in the reserves.

At the recruiter's office in our local town (not the big substation, but a tiny one) DH saw a sign advertising a nice signing bonus for anyone with an Associates Degree. Well, as of June 1, 2008 DH HAS an Associates Degree!!! This prompted him to go inside and talk with this new recruiter. He found out that the reserves requirement is bogus, and not only can he go in active duty but that he would be able to promote very quickly through several ranks due to his Associates Degree.

From a financial aspect, this would be a HUGE life saver for us. We would be able to pay off our debt, start a savings account, and the move into base housing where ever we are stationed would alleviate the stress of most of our bills. Also, DH would be able to continue his Bachelor's degree on the Army's dime...so no more student loans. YAY! In 24 months he will be done with his BA and able to apply for OCS - Officer's Candidate School...and being an officer would help us even more!

So, in many many many ways this would be a HUGE help to us and a huge blessing.

I am, however, nervous at this prospect. I want him to go for it. He would love it, it would help us financially and allow us to enjoy each and our children more, and we'd get to do many of the things with our children that we want to do. However, we would be moving away from where we live, and have only recently gotten totally settled into living here. For the next 11 years we would be living away from our family, whom our children have grown VERY attached to. Taking them away from their "Grandma" and "Abba" would be heartbreaking. Also, an Iraqi deployment would be a sure thing. The thought of caring for 3 small children alone terrifies me. I know that I would move back to my home town for that year, but it is still scary.

So, if you could please pray that God moves us in the direction that He has for us, and makes this path obvious for us, it would be appreciated. Thank you!

"I Want my Mommy!"

My mom makes some wonderful trips to Jamaica to do missions work...and does a lot of work helping with the local deaf school. She does very good work and I am proud of her.

But she goes down 3-6 times a year, and for the whole week to ten days she's gone I have zero contact with her. I talk to my mom every day, and see her several times a week so these trips are hard. I miss her. I feel guilty for dreading her trips, but I am SOOOO proud of her at the same time.

In case you can't tell, she's there right now...along with 2 of my sisters. I miss them but I am immensely proud of them as well.

I guess I just want to say, "I WANT MY MOMMY!!!" Hurry home safely mom, but may God lead you to impact the lives of those whom you are helping.

Mothers can't do it (give birth) *rant*

Wow...the medical community is getting pretty good at refusing to recognize birth as a natural, normal process...and a REALLY good job of scaring mothers into thinking our bodies aren't "good enough." I hear of things like this and it makes my stomach churn (or would that be the ongoing morning sickness? LOL).

http://rixarixa.blogspot.com/2008/07/more-better-birth-track-tm.html

And yes, I went and checked out the product. *gag*

Baby Update

Wow, no special title here. LOL I had another ultrasound today. Baby is continuing to be checked every 6 weeks for any bone deformities (since Sweet Pea has some bone issues) and today was our 24 week scan. I am 24 weeks today. Baby is measuring as an absolutely perfect 50th percentile 25 week 5 day gestational age baby GIRL! Yes, she's still a girl and still a Samantha Rose. She's measuring big, but proportionate for all bone/structure measurements. So, the perinatologist isn't worried. She currently weighs in at 1 lb 10 oz. So, she's a nice healthy size for her age.

I then went to the chiropractor up the road for an adjustment. I've not been in 6 weeks (gas is $4 a gal. and she's a 30-45 min. drive...OUCH!) and have been in excruciating pain in my pelvic/lower back area. It turns out that my sacrum is out of alignment, and is causing me to be in so much pain that by the kids' bed time I'm in agony and don't get out of bed myself (I sit there on my lap top working on homework). The sacrum is a bone but also a joint. Imagine your shoulder or rib being misaligned. Then put all your weight bearing on that section, add a growing uterus pressing up against it and that joint having to bear the weight of a 2 lb baby, the uterus, and the weight of all the amniotic fluid and placenta. From this picture I'm sure you can imagine the kind of pain that this leaves me in.

Finally, the misalignment is causing the baby to be breech. Not a big concern at 24 weeks, but since I can feel her trying to turn head down every night, it shows enough that we will have bigger concerns down the road if this problem isn't dealt with now. So, back to weekly adjustments. And, for tonight, back to icing my back.

That's all for now! I have some great sono pictures that I'll try and get DH to scan later for me. :o)